Persuasive Coaching: To Lead Learn How to Follow

Over Christmas my wife and I got into Game of Thrones. We’re a little late to the “game” but managed to plow through nearly four seasons of the show! One scene in particular caught my attention. Jeor Mormont, the old, gruff commander of the men of the Nights Watch, said to Jon Snow, the impetuous bastard son of nobleman Ed Stark, “You want to lead one day, then learn how to follow!”

The reason this caught my attention was because of the coaching we do at State Auto Insurance. We developed a 2-hour workshop for all employees called Coaching U and Your Career. During our time together we focus on why the company moved from performance management to a coaching culture, how to be coachable and what coaching can do for an employee’s personal and professional goals.

Something we emphasize during the training is this: when you learn to be coachable you’re also learning many of the same skills it takes to be a good coach.

For a moment think about great coaches you’ve had, whether in sports, business or some other area of life. What qualities did they display? If you’re like people who attend our workshops many of these words might have come to mind: patient, good listener, teacher, trust, care, friend, team player, expertise, knowledgeable, communicator.

Now consider this. If you were a manager charged with coaching your team, what qualities would you want people to display? These are the words we hear quite often: trust, vulnerable, listen, team player, eager, care, patient, confidence, open-minded, communicator.

Do you see the overlap in traits? About half of the words – trust, listen, team player, care, patient and communicator – appear on both lists. When you’re coachable you’re learning what it takes to coach.

Here’s the good news – each of these traits is a skill which means with concentration and practice you can get better at each. Work on being more coachable and you’re laying the foundation to be a coach.

In business, everyone needs to be coachable because, depending on the environment, we all experience times when we’re in subordinate positions. Even CEOs report to the board of trustees in the organizations they lead so they need to be coachable too.

In much the same way that Jeor Mormont admonished Jon Crow, “You want to lead one day, then learn how to follow,” if you want to coach one day then learn how to be coachable.

Brian Ahearn, CMCT®, is the Chief Influence Officer at InfluencePEOPLE. His course, Persuasive Selling, has been viewed more than 110,000 times! Have you seen it yet? Watch it to learn how to ethically engage the psychology of persuasion throughout the sales process.

Does Your Audience Know You’re an Authority?

Earlier this year I spoke at The Ohio State University to a few dozen business coaches where I shared some insight on
Robert Cialdini’s principles of influence and their application to the coaching process.
In this short video I briefly explore the principle of authority, which tells us people look to those with superior knowledge and expertise when they’re not 100% certain about what they should do. When you want to persuade people having them know something about your expertise up front can sometimes make all the difference.

If you’re viewing this post by email click here for the video.

Are you looking for a keynote speaker, training, or consulting on how to apply scientifically proven principles of
influence to your sales, marketing, management or leadership? If so, reach out to me ( or 614.313.1663) and we’ll talk about your specific needs.

Brian, CMCT 
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Coaches Aren’t Just for Athletes

I was invited by Mike Figliuolo to write a guest post for his blog, thoughtLEADERS, this week. Mike’s written several guest posts for Influence PEOPLE so I’m always happy to return the favor (reciprocity). The article focuses on the need for coaching to maximize each individual’s performance in the business environment. I hope you enjoy the article.Brian, CMCT


Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.

Coaches Aren’t Just for Athletes

I think you’ll agree with this statement; no athlete can reach their full potential without a great coach.

When you think of some of the greatest athletes quite often they’re synonymous with their coach. Michael Jordan had Phil Jackson, Tiger Woods started with Butch Harmon, and Mary Lou Retton worked with Bella Karolyi. None of them would have attained the greatness they did without the guidance and feedback from their coaches.Why is it in business we think we can reach our full potential without coaching? Great leaders are not just visionaries, they coach. They help their people develop so they can succeed in their role and get ready for the opportunities that may come down the pike. Over the years I’ve heard many reasons and have listed a few of the most common below:

To to read the rest of this article at thoughtLEADERS click here.